Kindergarten?!?!

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow, I give one of my most prized possessions to the care of someone else.

My first baby, my only son, my Landon starts kindergarten tomorrow.

I know he is smart. And he is so ready to go!

I'm worried that I've not done enough to get him prepared.

I'm not worried about him forgetting his letters or numbers or how to count by 10's & 5's. I'm not worried about not learning to tie his shoes.

I've had 5 1/2 years with my boy. I took off 12 weeks after he was born, went back for 10 weeks, and have been home with him ever since ( besides subbing, teaching swim lessons, and the pumpkin patch). He was my reason to get out of bed so many days. He always has a hug to give. I love him so much & I have enjoyed my time with him.

But, this is the start of the rest of the next 13+ years of his life. And it's scary.

Did I teach him enough about LIFE?

Does he know how to be kind to everyone? Does he know how to help someone who is hurting? Have I taught him how to answer adults politely? Did I teach him how to speak kindly? Did I teach him what to do if he is scared?

What if he gets hurt ? Oh, I hate to think of not being there with him to help him through. I pray that I've given him the tools to get on with this next chapter in life.

He knows I'm a little upset about all of this kindergarten business. He keeps reminding me that he will still be my baby. He still sleeps with this bear (Maximus) and his Lovey ( Lovey).

I tucked him in with both tonight.

I pray he is a friend to everyone.  I hope he enjoys school. I hope he knows just how special he is to me.

I pray that all of his teachers this year love him like their own. I hope they know how to teach him. I hope he stays the same sensitive boy. I hope he continues to be a leader. I pray he leads others in the right direction. I hope he can enjoy every minute of this journey. I hope if he gets hurt or sad that he knows Who to call on.

I'm sure there will be a flood of tears tomorrow morning at drop off!

I'm leaving my baby in the hands of others.

I am praying for his safety and my sanity.

I know there's more I could have done. I could have been slower to anger. I could have yelled less. I could have napped with him more. I could have played in the yard more.

But I hope he knows I've done the best I knew how.

But  now I have all day to spend with the other 2 and work on this job of motherhood. I still have 2 years until Lucy goes through this, and then 2 more after that until Ella starts school.

Pray for me with those two all day!!! ;)

We made pizzas tonight, and made a cake ( like we did last year before pre-school) before bed. I've got his uniform set out. Luke has muffin mix out ready to make early in the morning. His backpack is packed with supplies. We've got gifts for teachers ready. We read( and I bawled) The Night Before Kindergarten. The camera battery is charging.  We've talked about what to expect. He has 2 friends already in his class.

I haven't woken daily to an alarm in over 5 years. The girls fought bedtime the past few nights and especially tonight. We are going to completely change their schedule to fit around drop off and pick up for Landon, and they will be waking( & napping) about 1-2 hours earlier than normal.

I've never been one to do good with change. AT ALL.

But I'm ready for a good routine.

I'm ready for him to learn!

I know he will do great!

{ Yes, I realize he isn't going off to college tomorrow, and it's only a half day the first day. }

I can't wait to see him grow in his academics, in the Lord, and in life.

I will add pictures tomorrow =)