29 weeks and 5 days!

It is officially past midnight, it's now Monday morning, and I am officially 29 weeks and 5 days in this pregnancy. I had Lucy on a Monday at 29 weeks and 5 days. At 29 weeks and 4 days, my legs were numb by lunch at Olive Garden, there was an AWESOME snow storm ( December 12th,2010) that cancelled our Sunday school progressive party 

 my ankles had blown up beyond recognition

 and my right side was starting to hurt. Today, I made it through church, lunch, the mall, a great nap, and some maternity/family pictures! I kept watching my ankles. The last time I took my blood pressure today, it was 117/66 (still WAY far off from 175/112 ) . Today was a good day, and my body has made it farther ( as of 6:14 tonight) than it did my last pregnancy!

I didn't do a chalkboard picture this week. I just had no motivation, nor did I find any time to do it. This is my 29 week belly picture though, just trying on an outfit this weekend for our pictures today. I think they will be great--except for Lucy's hair. My fault. I couldn't find a bow that I wanted to match her shoes, but I found a headband. Her hair was CRAZY today, and the headband didn't stay in well. I brought a backup ponytail holder and a big bow ( that was toooo big to use solo). It looked cute, but her waterfall of hair on top of her head wanted to lay TO THE FRONT. Hopefully within 2 weeks, I will be able to post some pictures! I know almost 30 weeks is a tad bit early for maternity pictures, but I was really sad about missing out on some maternity things after I had Lucy, so I wanted to get these in before anything crazy goes on. Plus, we haven't had family pictures since Landon was 14 months. Yep, first family pictures with all 4 of us!

Landon cooperated , for the most part, during pictures. We pulled through Starbucks on the way home to get both the kids cakepops, and they were out of their favorite--birthday cake & tiramisu. They both got raspberry truffle, and had lovely messy faces afterwards!

We head back to the doctor in a week. Hoping for a post or 2 before AND quite a few more before baby pictures !

State fair, Nashville, & doctor visit

We only had a short amount of time that we were able to spend at the fair this year. I never understood the TN state fair when I lived there. It was so small. It didn't seem to have nearly even half the exhibits or displays or ' things entered to be judged' (whatever word that is) concerts,shows,and just things to do. We always heard that the Wilson County was the fair to go to, and we tried it last year, but it was not anything at all like the Kentucky State fair. I searched on-line last year for the top State Fairs, and The Kentucky State Fair was on most of the lists for top 10. I guess that is why the others seemed so boring. It's not so cheap, but growing up everyone went multiple days. And when you do just go one day, it's a 10 hour day you spend . There are plenty of places indoors to walk and look, so it's not too hot really. We only were able to go once Luke got off work, and stayed until a little after dark. We walked around a few of the wings in the fairgrounds to see the cakes, quilts, Christmas trees (!!!!), and the KidZone. We got just a little bit of food--Landon scarfed a corndog, Lucy munched on some fries, Lucy also wanted all of my loaded baked potato, and Luke had some type of sandwich. The kids also got a msassive bag of  cotton candy while Luke and I shared a funnel cake.We only let Landon ride 2 rides, they get expensive! He had a blast and didn't want to leave. I wished he could have ridden every ride there. Next year, we will for sure go on a wristband day! 

If you want to go on a short trip in August, check out the KY State fair next year. You won't be disappointed!

Summer afternoon—summer afternoon; to me those have always been the two most beautiful words in the English language. 

~Henry James

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We went to the NICU party this past weekend. Lucy & Landon both loved the games,candy, and cake. I loved to see the nurses and doctors and respiratory therapists who took care of my teeny tiny baby for 53 days all day and night. It's also great to see other mommies and daddies who we've read about on the NICU facebook page, followed on their blogs, or remember watching them enter or leave the NICU daily while we were there as well. 

24 weeks & 4 days

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I had my 24 week appointment today. I'll be 25 weeks in 2 days! I've been totally fine mentally so far in the past few months. I feel like everything will be fine. I have a feeling we will be closer to the 37 week mark before we deliver this baby. But ,then in the back of my head ,I just see us in the hospital in month & thinking are we REALLY doing this AGAIN?

When my doctor walked in, before he could even see me, he expressed that he was happy I had behaved so far, and that we have something to be thankful for. (Before he came in, I had started having some doubts. As I stopped into the bathroom before my BP and weight check, I wondered how many more times I will GET to write my name on the little plastic cup. My BP was good, slight change to the top # but all well within normal. My weight is ok--I'm at 14 pounds gained. BUT 7 WERE SINCE THE LAST VISIT! ahh I had a big gain like that with Lucy right before things headed the wrong direction.) So after he said everything was good so far, there was the silence and the head bobbing. I've had that with both pregnancies. Then he said that's he's nervous now. So am I. I had been holding back tears since I had sat down on the table. We're just getting closer to the point that wasn't so pleasant before. As I laid back to measure the belly and hear the heartbeat, he said Watch, we'll be scheduling our 39 week c-section, and everything will end up fine. I told him that is my main thought when I'm trying not to worry, that at 39 weeks when everything is still fine, I'll have wasted it all for nothing. He quickly said BUT WITH NO COMPLAINING, RIGHT? I fully assured him that I hate when someone is at 36/37 week just saying they want to be done, and they just have NO clue. 

As he was walking out, he made THAT joke again. He made me promise I wouldn't misbehave--as in don't let your BP get so high, get pre-e, get HELLP, and have a seizure. That's been his little 'joke' since the beginning. He said he is too old to deal with all of that. The last doctor that had THAT JOKE with me, was after I delivered Lucy. My doctor kept telling me that we just had to make sure I didn't dance without the music. I had no clue what he meant really, or that it was that serious that I could have a seizure. He didn't joke or smile or even really laugh again until Lucy was about 2 months old. It was far enough past the scary that he felt comfortable to smile, even if it was him talking about how happy he was when I started pulling the oxygen mask off my face. You don't ever want a doctor to say that a moment they had with you was the best moment in their medical career. I've realized since then that it is the ultra scary moments that have been turned into a joking matter. It's not funny. But how else does a doctor say Hey, don't have a seizure & almost have your liver explode again! Our visits always end with a laugh and  smile, but it's a different level than I'd prefer. 

I will be going every 2 weeks from now on. Since we just don't know, he doesn't want me to get sick, and just fall in the cracks, and us miss something in a months' span. I'll be heading back on the 10th, and then 2 weeks after for the glucose screening and my 28/29 week visit. I'll keep updating as we go!

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“As for God, his way is perfect: 

    The Lord’s word is flawless; 

    he shields all who take refuge in him.

For who is God besides the Lord?

    And who is the Rock except our God?

It is God who arms me with strength^[h]

    and keeps my way secure.

2 Samuel 22:31-33

Bronze

It's been 8 years. If I had to do it all over.......we'd go to a beach, have wonderful wedding pictures with the ocean & sunset,& enjoy the day! We contemplated that idea 8 years & 2 months ago (when we got engaged), but didn't want to hear opinions & deal with family not wanting to travel. At least my Florida family would have made it . They couldn't really get out anywhere to come north due to traffic from hurricanes & my grandma had diabetes complications with her foot & was told not to fly....the week before....and my grandpa was marrying us :/ But we survived & ended up married! I'm lucky I'm in love with my best friend. Lucky to have been where I have been.

I decided to try to attempt to get Luke a present from all the traditional yearly gifts. I had to get creative & make believe a little bit. His year 1--paper --was the card, and I listed all the year/gift/meanings for them inside it.  Then i put a sticker on each gift with the year/number. His cotton & leather, year 2&3, were flip flops.

Yep, a little bit of cotton & leather on there ;) I guess I skipped 4. A flower or ...I forget. Something like that? 5 is wood.

Check out the bag his other present was in.6,7,&8 I just assumed all that metal stuff was in his real present ;)

iron, copper, bronze? Yep, I bet they're in there somewhere.

Then Luke got home with a box & said that the bow was almost a bronze color. I immediately started laughing and asked him if I left his iPad up to the page I was looking the stuff up at. He couldn't understand me through my laughing, but then told me that even the inside of my card had a bronzing color on it! CrAZy boy!

The other gift for 8 years is pottery. Of course he bought me a soup cup (for coffee) to go paint at the Paint Spot & signed us up for a class next week too. ALONG with a pre-natal massage! He is thoughtful after all ;) He did good!

And I'm also SO very proud of Landon for keeping his daddy's present a secret. He did good too!

We also hit 23 weeks Wednesday in this pregnancy #3.

I'm not so sure how these pictures will show up on here because I'm using the blog app on the iPad,& I haven't done that before. Hopefully I won't have to re-arrange later on. I'm sure they are crazy big where you have to click on them to see the entire thing too. :)
Keep the prayers up. We need 2 more good weeks of no high blood pressure. We'll take 16 though, in case you didn't know. Next weekend we head to Nashville for the NICU reunion birthday party. Then I'll go back to the doctor on Monday. I wanted to get out of town again before my doctor suggests staying around-- I'd hate to feel bad going against what he says. BUT if I happen to get sick, I'd rather be AT the hospital anyways in Nashville, so we should be fine. I'll have plenty of pictures to post when we return!

2:20AM. Bad habit is back. Mommy needs her sleep to take care of 2 kids & grow #3. Good night!

O

4 weeks later....

Lucy is still snuggled in her bed at the NICU.

Well, except for when Mommy or Daddy get to hold her. I don't always get to hold her everyday =(  I didn't last night because I got up there so late, and there was a lot going on in the OR and L&D, and it was almost 6:00 ( no visitors from 6-8). And we went up this morning, and I wasn't able to hold her either.  She did get her temperature probe taken off of her body when she hit 3 pounds and 5 ounces (as of Saturday night), and is able to get out once per shift to be held. She weighed in last night at 3 pounds and 6 ounces.Her feedings are up to 28ml, and she tried a bottle last night for the first time! She ate almost half of her 8PM feeding out of it, was pretty messy but did OK, and then did the rest with her feeding tube. I really wanted to be there to see her try it for the first time, but we were at home. I had left just at 6 to come home, and we had planned on going right back up after Landon ate.....we just never got around to it. This is the worst part about her being in the NICU. My baby is 4 weeks old, and she isn't at home. I feel like I've just missed my baby's whole first month of life. I try to think of it as her still being in the womb, since she is secluded basically in an incubator. She shouldn't and wouldn't even be here yet, possibly even about 4 more weeks.But I don't have her inside me, and I can see her outside and hold her, so it just doesn't work. I get upset and worried that it's not going to be the same because she won't know me like she would if she was born regular and came straight home.  She doesn't get to feel me, touch me, hear me, or see me everyday. I've only held her skin to skin 3 times in the last 4 weeks. I guess that is partly my fault for not knowing I could just ask to do it. You hear so much about how skin to skin is important, and my Lucy is just laying in a bed hooked up to cords.
I realized Saturday that I haven't gotten out at all, besides the hospital, since before she was born. The first week, I was in the hospital. The second week, I was in bed most of the time besides going to the hospital because Landon was out of town.Luke went back to work the 3rd week. I did what I needed to do around the house while he was gone, while taking care of Landon, and pumping every 3 hours. Then tried to head to the hospital when Luke was off of work. Somewhere in the 3rd and 4th week we all got the stomach bug! We went to eat Friday night ( I think?), and of course a baby carrier came in right behind us with a little baby girl, and I started to tear up. Then a pregnant girl sat down next to us waiting, talking about how she is due towards the end of February. It's just so WEIRD that I had a baby in me for 30 weeks, being proud and excited of the belly, and had just started fitting into maternity clothes really,strangers always asking about what we were having & what her name is. Now I have her, yet I can't show her off to anyone, it is just a big hole and really makes me feel absolutely incomplete.
 I'm probably the only person who has ever cried when they put away their maternity clothes. Half of it is just because the situation really just sucks and it still upsets me, the other half is because I don't know if I will ever get to pull them out again. I was only 30 weeks and delivered a 2 pound baby, so obviously maternity clothes wouldn't fit my more than like a week after I had her. But I'm not regular size yet, so clothes just make me upset altogether =) We hadn't decided yet if we wanted another or not(but for sure were NOT going to do fertility treatments for the 3rd), and even though I know a few people with HELLP that had a perfectly fine pregnancy afterwards, I just don't know if it's something I can handle worrying about. You have 2 emergency c-sections for random issues that are not related to each other at all, that baffle everyone as to why they happened how they did, and you wonder if it is really worth it to go for it again. It's not something that I need to worry about now, but still in the back of my mind, and putting away maternity clothes made me think about it.
So, I still have moments every day that make me upset. I really think it's something that is not understandable unless you have been at home for a month without your child. It's just a frustrating situation, but we are so thankful that she is healthy and alive. All you ask for is a healthy child, but really? It didn't have to be taken THIS far when it came to that. Never did we want her to be a "long term baby" in the NICU, but it's much better than some other options out there. We just try to keep that in perspective when we get sad. Hopefully, we are almost there! She's growing and progressing more and more everyday. I can't wait to have her home in my arms. I'm not sure if I'll ever put her down!

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20 weeks!

We have made it half-way!

Today was another ultrasound, and since they just measured almost everything at 18 weeks, it was a lot quicker. I drank a TON of orange juice, a little coffee, and ate a small breakfast on the way to the Dr, hoping it would make her more active and visible than last time! The heart was in perfect view, and they were able to see the 4th chamber that they couldn't see at 18 weeks. Her face was in semi-perfect view, BUT she had her legs wrapped up on her head, so still didn't get a good face shot =) I'm not going to put the ultrasound pictures up because she didn't cooperate all the way, and she looks like an animal! She was moving around quite a bit all morning, and we did see that on the ultrasound as well.

We had several questions today that we wanted to ask the Dr.--from the baby's health, to delivery, to post pardum issues.He did assure us that everything is checking out healthy with Lucy. They did see blood in my placenta still, so it is still most likely the reason for the ecogenic ( I think that's the word!) bowel, and the reason for the triple screen marker coming back high. There is still  the tiny chance of other abnormalities, they did mention cystic fibrosis today as well, but none of those we will find out until she is born. Everything else points towards healthy! So we are worry free, and are still feeling blessed for being chosen to be parents to baby Lucy! The 24 & 28 week visit will be normal, but I will have another ultrasound at week 32 to re-check the baby. He also wants to check the fluid level this time around. The chances of that being low again are not likely, but they are probable. He feels much safer just keeping an eye on all of these things--for his and our sanity, rather than because he expects anything to go wrong.He also let us know that the 2 vessel thing isn't as big of a worry as it use to be because they are able to see everything now with ultrasounds. And also that it causes no life-long issues, that the vessels clot up after the baby is born, and go away anyway, so it only having 2 won't affect it.

We had decided that I wanted to try for a VBAC, and he had agreed that if all went well, no complications, and I was ready to go by or before my due date, I'd have no issues. I had been thinking this week about it a little bit with some of the possible complications with the 2 cord, bowel stuff, and her being small. So Luke asked today about the delivery, and he said we probably can count on a repeat c-section. But we don't have to schedule it until later on, unless I decide I want to sooner. There are just a few 'ifs' still floating around, so I want whatever is safest for the baby and me. But if I'm ready to have the baby, it's descending, and everything is good, I can still go ahead. So =) we still will play it by ear, but we know that most likely she will be a Valentine's baby, and be delivered around 39 weeks!

I've gained right around 6-7 pounds at this point, and I think it picks up to about a pound a week now. I did ask if I was going to start gaining more.And he said to not go out and pig out to gain, but just keep doing exactly what I am doing. He also said keep working out, and doing as much as I can still because it will keep me feeling better, besides keeping me healthy. I did ask about my headaches because they have been SO HORRIBLE the past 2 weeks. I wanted to make sure I wasn't taking too much Tylenol.Thankfully, Luke has been home when they have been the worst, so I am able to crawl into bed--which he also said is another great thing to do.

We know the next 18-20 weeks will be great!
 People have been giving us clothes to sort through, Elyssa gave us her 3 in 1 crib & changing table, and Luke & my mom bought some accessories {valance, wall hangings, wall stickers, diaper stacker, and a blanket} to match the bedding we will buy.
As soon as we get the bedroom carpet installed, we will slowly start to move things in and set them up in her room. We'll keep adding pictures as we go =)

Music Playlist at MixPod.com



Life is SO exciting!

We had the routine triple screen blood test during my 3rd baby Dr. visit, and the spina bifida marker came back high. Most often the tests DO come back positive for downs or SB, and are not correct. My Dr. had assured me already  that I might get a call with the results, and not to worry AT ALL because there is usually another reason. I had heard many stories of downs coming back, but didn't know anyone who had SB come back. I knew it all would be OK if something was wrong, but we needed an ultra sound to determine, and get surgeries set up if needed after the birth.

The head & belly both measured perfect--they are indicators of SB--and the spine looked great as well as the feet! They did notice bright white coloring in the bowel--which indicates blood. This means that most likely the results came back from bleeding I had early in pregnancy ( which was the reason for ultrasound at week 10). The baby's stomach is not mature enough to digest it, but it will later on.

The rest of the body measured great as well. They had a hard time seeing the heart because the baby was laying face DOWN curled up the entire time. This also meant we never got a good face shot. AND not only was the baby face down, but the legs were crossed too =) This made it difficult to see the gender as well. Since we were in there looking around, why not find out if it's a girl or a boy? We were able to see the 3 white lines a few quick times, along with her flexing her bicep, sucking her thumb ( Elyssa LOVED that), and her cute little modest legs crossed at the ankles. The radiologist did come in to check the heart, and it all looked fine once they got a good view. There was a detection of a '2 vessel chord' which has to do with the umbilical chord  having less vessels or arteries. The radiologist said the baby still gets the blood flow they need, but it gives you a small percentage of down syndrome. Since my blood came back OK, that most likely won't be the case. It also gives you a small percentage of the baby having birth defects, but since everything measured well, he thinks that will all be OK too. I didn't go see my Dr after the visit, and he hasn't called back with any other news, so it seems that everything is good. We do go back on October 5th ( 20 week visit) for the full ultrasound and then a Dr. visit. They will measure everything again, and hopefully we will get a good face shot, and some good 3d pictures. My Dr. has said that we will check at one point for low fluid again, so we will most likely have another US towards the end, but I'm not sure if the 2 chord warrants more monitoring or not. I'm beginning to think there is no such thing as a 'normal' pregnancy! But we will go through whatever it takes to get a baby here, and safely!

With it being in the 90's still last week towards the end of September, we were beginning to wonder what the temperatures will be in Gatlinburg when we go on the 8th. 2 years ago, when I was pregnant with Landon, it was in the high 80's, and last year it was chilly! It looks to be getting cooler FINALLY! Now, if only I had clothes that fit =( My maternity clothes look 'massive'--as Luke assured me last night. And my regular clothes fit ok, until I sit down and have to unbutton my pants, and all my shirts fit weird. Maybe I will grow some in the next 2 weeks, and get to try out some cute Autumn maternity clothes!

Oh, the baby's name is Lucy!

I love how when I texted people to say it was a girl, they told me congrats on Lucy. I guess I've said it enough in the past few years for people to catch on =) So, it seems that I will NOT be making a quilt for the baby bedding, since we fell in love with the bedding in the last blog. YAY, it's all so exciting!

A few things. . .

{Some new Pumas}

My pink Nike shocks and my other pink shoes have been worn out , and have grass stains on them from cutting it. That only leaves me with my running shoes--which are for running and working out.

{maternity skinny jeans}

I was looking at websites ( a pea in the pod, pickles and ice cream...), and i can't believe people will pay the same amount of $ for a double stroller as they will for a pair of jeans they will wear for like 6 months! So, Motherhood Maternity $34 skinny jeans will work for me. But this picture is of the jeans that were close to $200. And yes, my regular jeans still fit me perfectly fine for now =) But i know it will happen sooner or later!

{pink terry hoodie}

I need something pink to cover the belly.To match the shoes.

My birthday is in about 20 days if you feel like spending some money. =)