Decision time.....

 

When is the right time for me to go back to work? I have no clue! I know that I have 3 children & a husband in management in retail. His schedule is not the same. Ever. The days he works, and the hours a day are always changing--even on his day off he might get called to come fix an area that is atrocious because someone is flying in the next day from the regional office. 3 children in day care or preschool or an early learning center would probably not be affordable unless I was back to full time work. I've managed to do part time things a good bit since I had Landon. I went back for the last 10 weeks of school and taught when Landon was a baby, I substituted at the school I had taught at during my pregnancy with Lucy ( only on Luke's days off), I taught swim lessons at the YMCA in Louisville until I got pregnant with Ella, I've done some tweeting and facebooking for Blogher campaings, and I'm about to start a little something at a pumpkin patch for about a month and a few weeks.

I do not want to go back to work full time.

We have had seasons in life where we have spent and spent and spent with no worries. We have had seasons in life where we were rotating bills each month( to be late) in order to have gas to get to work and buy groceries and had another week to make that $58 last in the account.

Sometimes we feel like we are drowning. Sometimes we are at Disney with the kids and no worry in the world.

But I have always had the thought in the back of my head that I could be teaching, making over $35,000 a year and getting these DANG STUDENT LOANS PAID OFF. We pay over $400 a month in student loans. That's more than we spend on groceries. That's almost half of our mortgage. Luke still hasn't graduated and I only used my degree for 4 years. What a waste.....But hey, we made some good friends playing basketball and baseball, right? ;)

year 3/3 of playing

 

Medical bills--both of the kids were in the hospital last year in Louisville. Ella was born--dropped from insurance(!!!!!!!), and I had a 3 day stay in the hospital before I had Ella.

(This is not an open invitation to ask me to sell your products--beauty, health, bags, candles.)

I could do SO much with that money each month if I just went back. We could get those student loans paid off so quickly, medical bills could be gone in a few short months, cars could be paid off almost immediately.

To me, being a stay-at-home mom is not anything like a Housewife of Whatever County, it isn't anything close to a Pretty Wicked Mom, or remotely like a Basketball Wife. I am sacrificing clothes and fun things to be around my kids. I have those 2 outfits I rotate. My kids wear Granimals and Circo, and we buy Monster sale at The Children's Place a year in advance. They don't all go to Mother's Day Out. We do not eat out, and we do not have extra money to buy organic and local and non boxed foods.

I realize I could EASILY go back to work, and be able to do anything I wanted to do. I'm just having SUCH a hard time deciding to do that. 1) I WANT to be with my kids at home. 2) I don't want to work right now =)

Before we found out about Ella, the plan was for me to go back to work when Landon started school. I also was not sure if I wanted to go back to school to become a nurse or go back to teach. I'm turning 30 next week ( AAAHHHHH!) and I do not know what I want to be 'when I grow up'.

I just don't know what to do.

Ideal situation for me-- work in a job share next year and have someone come to the house and watch the kids on those days. I also wouldn't mind working at a home-school program 2 days a week & having someone watch the kids at the house ( Landon would be in school at this point).

Luke still isn't in his own store. He took a step down (position and pay) when we moved back to Nashville. He compared himself yesterday to a player on the bench. He's been in the game, and got taken out. He's sitting next to Coach Store Manager right now, getting some more instruction,waiting to go back in.

I'm just praying there is a dead ball SOON, and he gets his chance to get back in the game!

I've got a lot of praying to do myself with my whole job situation. I know I could ask others their opinion and I'd get 1 of 3 answers:

1) I wish I could stay home with my kids. Why would you go back to work?

2) I don't know HOW you stay at home, I HAVE to work to stay sane!

3) Cherish this time, they grow too fast, you'll never get it back!

I don't know who said money doesn't buy happiness. I fully agree that life is quite a bit easier with 2 paychecks coming in every other week. Stress and anxiety over finances causes quite a bit of unhappiness.

Right now, we will just keep on keeping on! Maybe I will know what it is I am supposed to do soon enough.

 

On a funny note about moms, these use to drive me crazy posted all day on Facebook. But I pinned a few on pinterest that I think are hilarious.